The Questions Every Client Asks (And My Honest Answers)

I can usually tell when a client has a question they’re afraid to ask me.

Sometimes it’s about money. Sometimes it’s about whether the inspiration photos they’ve saved are realistic. And sometimes they want to know if I’m going to judge the state of their house when I come over.

For the record, I’m not. I’d rather see how you live than how you want me to think you live.

Most clients have the same handful of worries, whether we’re designing a powder room or renovating an entire house. And I’d much rather talk about them upfront than have someone spend six months worrying about something we could have cleared up in five minutes.

Why does hiring an interior designer cost so much?

You’re paying for a lot more than the time I spend choosing tile and drawing floor plans.

There’s on-site measuring, creative thinking, sketching, mathing, ordering samples, reviewing samples, ordering more samples, putting together digital presentations, getting quotes, talking to trades, and traveling between showrooms and job sites. And that’s before I’ve shown you a single design.

Then comes procurement, scheduling, coordinating installations, dealing with warranties, and solving problems along the way.

HGTV has done a wonderful job convincing people that designers walk into a room, instantly know what to do, and transform the place before the next commercial break. I wish.

Some clients prefer to work on an “as you go” hourly basis, while others engage us for a larger scope of work. For a new-construction home, my design fees can reach tens of thousands of dollars by the time we’re finished. (And if you think that’s expensive, you should see how much it costs to fix things when you don’t have a designer involved from the start!)

How much should I budget for my renovation?

Everyone has a budget. Everyone.

For some perspective, here are a few averages I use when talking with clients in the Durham and Triangle market:

• Around 10% of a home’s current value for a full primary bathroom remodel.
• Around 20% of a home’s current value for a kitchen remodel.
• Around $125 per square foot for furniture and decor, not including art.

These are averages based on what I see in my market, not industry standards across the country. Plenty of projects come in above or below these numbers.

I want clients to be open and honest about their numbers. Not because I’m trying to take them to the very top of their budget, but because I want to make smart decisions with them. Is that number for materials only? Labor, too? Do you have a construction loan?

Maybe we splurge on the cabinetry and find a more economical lighting option. Maybe the tile you’ve fallen in love with is worth the extra expense, but we need to rethink something else.

I can’t help you make those tradeoffs if nobody knows what the budget is.

I have 400 Pinterest photos. Is that helpful?

Yes! Until you decide you need an exact replica of something you saw in a $10 million house.

I encourage clients to collect inspiration. Pinterest and Instagram are great tools for figuring out what you’re drawn to, especially if you have trouble describing your style.

The trouble starts when someone gets hyperfixated on one specific feature without realizing it’s entirely custom, wildly expensive, or physically impossible to fit into their house.

Sometimes the photos don’t match the house, each other, or even what the client is standing in front of me telling me they want.

That’s when I start asking questions. What do you like about this photo? Is it the color? The shape of the cabinetry? The way the room feels? The combination of materials?

Usually, there’s a common thread, a throughline. Once I find it, I can start making design decisions that capture what you love without trying to recreate someone else’s home.

And while we’re talking about inspiration, please stop pre-designing your house in AI. It’s not helpful, it’s not feasible, and it’s a huge turnoff. (Engraving this into my tombstone.)

Bring me all 400 Pinterest photos. Just be willing to talk about what we’re looking at.

Why are kitchen cabinets so expensive?

Cabinets are always more than you think they should cost.

Quality cabinetry is expensive because it is built to last. Materials, construction methods, finishes, hardware, and customization all affect your kitchen cabinet budget.

Then there’s freight, receiving, storage, inspection, and installation. Tariffs, fuel surcharges, and material shortages can affect pricing, too.

Can you buy cheaper cabinets at a big-box store? Of course. But you’re not necessarily getting comparable construction, quality, warranties or customization.

It’s the difference between a real Birkin bag and an Amazon dupe. They might look similar in a photo, but that doesn’t make them the same product.

Not every kitchen needs the most expensive cabinetry available. But you should understand what you’re paying for before deciding where to cut costs.

What am I paying you to catch that I wouldn’t notice myself?

I recently worked on an out-of-state project where the countertop fabricator accidentally made the side overhangs one inch longer than they were supposed to be.

My clients were wonderful about sending photos and FaceTiming me throughout the project. During one of those calls, I noticed something was off with the countertops. They extended too far past the cabinets.

Why make such a fuss over an inch?

The backsplash tile was going to align with the countertop edge. If we’d left the extra inch, the tile would have extended past the upper cabinets, creating an awkward jog in the backsplash.

I caught the mistake before the tile went in, and the countertops were cut down and reinstalled. That’s what you’re paying a designer to catch. I’m thinking about how today’s decisions will affect the next three steps, even when I’m looking at your kitchen through a phone screen.

My room doesn’t get much natural light. Shouldn’t we make everything light?

Not necessarily. I’ve said it before: Dark rooms should be dark, and light rooms should be light.

If you have a room with heavy tree coverage outside and a big covered porch blocking the sunlight, painting everything white isn’t going to magically turn it into a sunroom, so why fight it?

We can lean into darker colors and make the room feel intentionally cozy. Add decent lighting so you can see what you’re doing. Consider a reflective sheen on the walls or mirrors to help bounce light around.

There’s no such thing as being “stuck” with a dark space. It’s an opportunity to embrace your moodier side.

I promise a dark room will not kill you.

Why can’t I just find the same furniture online for less?

You might find something that looks similar online, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to perform the same way or work with everything else we’ve planned.

If something is over budget, let’s talk about it. I’d rather find an alternative than have an independently purchased piece compromise the design, schedule, or installation. And with big-box stores and online retailers, there’s often no help available when (not if) something goes wrong.

The pricing can be confusing, too. Full-service interior design purchasing doesn’t work like traditional retail. Through our direct-to-trade partnerships, we receive project-based pricing that accounts for the furnishings package as a whole, including freight, receiving, warehousing, delivery, and installation.

As selections change, costs can shift across individual pieces. That’s why itemized pricing isn’t always comparable to the sticker prices you see online. This structure can also offer more substantial savings when furnishing an entire home.

If you’re worried about the price, we should discuss it as a team. There’s almost always a better solution than shopping around the design we’ve already planned.

Can I ask my friends and family what they think of the design?

You can,  but every designer would just rather you didn’t. One of the sentences I dread most is, “I asked my best friend, who’s really good with design…”

It can muddy the waters when you ask everyone (friends, family, trusted spiritual gurus) for their opinions on the design we’ve created for you. Your best friend isn’t paying for the project. She’s not living in the house. And she hasn’t spent hours studying the floor plan, reviewing materials, and working through all the decisions that led to the design you’re looking at.

That doesn’t mean she has terrible taste. It means she’s seeing one small piece of a much bigger picture.

I want you to love your home. I also want you to feel comfortable telling me when something doesn’t feel right. But the more outside opinions you collect, the harder it becomes to recognize what you want.

What should I tell my designer that might be embarrassing?

Everything.

Second thoughts, new budget constraints, concerns about how something will hold up over time. Whatever’s giving you heartburn, tell me. Nine times out of ten, we’ve heard it before.

And don’t be afraid to tell me how you live.

You and your partner spend a lot of time together in the shower? Cool. Been there, heard that. If your kitchen counters are covered in stuff, don’t spend three hours hiding it before I arrive. The overflowing cabinets, the piles of shoes, the things you leave out because you use them every day? That’s useful information.

You can light a candle if you just cooked salmon. Otherwise, please don’t worry about impressing me.

How do I know which interior designer is right for me?

Go with your gut, not the cheapest person.

If you’re interviewing designers, remember that you could be talking to this person daily for the next 18 months. That’s a long time to work with someone you don’t particularly click with.

For me, the best relationships come down to trust. I love when clients let me show them something unique that they can’t find on Instagram, and they’re honest enough to tell me when they don’t love an idea.

I also think it’s important to know when to bring in someone else’s expertise. I’m not an architect, a landscape designer, or an expert on everything your heart desires, though I do wish I was!

There are plenty of things I’m deep in the weeds on, like countertops, cabinets, tile, and Wegmans (iykyk). But when something falls outside my expertise, I rely on people who know their specialties inside and out.

Everyone has their special interests. Let us lean into those and onto each other.

Have More Questions? Let’s Talk.

At Grau Design Studio in Durham, we offer full-service interior design backed by hands-on construction and project management experience. From kitchens and bathrooms to full-home renovations and new construction, we work with homeowners throughout Durham, Chapel Hill, and the Triangle.

If you’re considering an interior design consultation in Durham, take a look at how we work and the services we offer. Then let’s talk about your project, your budget, and what you’re hoping to accomplish.